What is the Red Moon cycle you might ask? It’s a symbolic way of speaking of a woman’s monthly cycle. Most women’s cycles are 28 days long and that’s the same amount of time that it takes our moon to do a full set of phases. This is why women in mythology are historically connected to the moon.
I have been tracking my Red Moon cycle for just over two years now. I was almost a perfect 28 days for the majority of that time but then I did something very stupid in the name of love. I went on the DEPO shot. You see, my ex and I were trying to figure out the best ways to prevent pregnancy in order to help our intimate relationship. I am very afraid of getting pregnant at this point in my life because I am not ready to raise a child and my partner had made it very clear that he did not want children, ever. Actually, one of the reasons we broke up is because he never wants children.
I made an appointment to speak with a sexual health nurse and we went over the options. I was basically talked into going on a progesterone based birth control. Between my ex and I, we decided to go with DEPO. I took the shot and I instantly regretted it. From that point on I experience a delay in my cycle that sent both my ex and I in fear that we might be pregnant because it took almost am extra month before my cycle returned and when it did, it was both heavy and it lasted three weeks!
I can tell you right now that going on DEPO drove a bigger divide between my ex and I then ever. Instead of helping our relationship, it cause us to retreat even further from one another. My body was causing me all sorts of discomfort and he was afraid of us getting pregnant to the point where he would not engage in any kind of intimacy. I grew resentful of him for talking me into DEPO and for blaming me for the pregnancy scare.
I have been off the DEPO for a over month now and it’s still messing with my cycle. I have been light spotting for almost a month solid . I have read that it can take up to 18 months to fully recover from the effects of the progesterone. It makes me ill to think about what I just put my body through all in an effort to appease someone who didn’t even love me anymore. I am writing this as a warning to anyone who maybe thinking of doing the same. Unless you have a medical reason such as endometriosis, I do not recommend any kind of progesterone based birth control if you value your connection to your Red Moon.
I have no fear of my Red Moon cycle, in fact I think of it as a deep spiritual connection. It’s a natural part of being female and binds us to the Earth and the Moon. We were never meant to mess with our bodies like this and I think the more we are aware of that, the healthier we will be. There are plenty of ways to be intimate if you fear getting pregnant. You can track your cycle using apps or marking it down in a journal, you can choose abstinence during times of ovulation, you can explore other forms of intimacy that don’t require penetration.
Your body is sacred and needs to be respected. If you find yourself in a relationship where you are being pressured into doing something you think might be bad for your body, please talked to your partner about it. That was my mistake and I wish I had been more clear, I might have been able to avoid the last four months of complications with my Red Moon cycle.
Men, if you are reading this and you are feeling uncomfortable talking about a woman’s natural cycle or talking about sexual options, you need to grow up. As cold as that sounds, you have no excuse in this day and age for not knowing. If you think your body is more important than your female companions, then you are not ready to be in a mature relationship. Education brings freedom to both men and women.
Women, learn about your cycle, talk about your cycle with your partner, be open and honest about it.
Men, learn about a woman’s cycle, ask questions about it, be open to hear what your companion has to say.
I hope that my story helps someone out there make an informed choice about their body and their Red Moon cycle.